


Nice One, Sebastian

by Lainie (mislainieous)



Category: Kuroshitsuji | Black Butler
Genre: Canon Trans Character, Dyslexia Mention, Gen, Humor, Mentioned Drug Dealing, Plot What Plot/Puns Without Plot, Vignette
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-11
Updated: 2016-04-26
Packaged: 2018-06-01 15:20:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 3,198
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6525601
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mislainieous/pseuds/Lainie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ciel, Sebastian, and puns: a collection of vignettes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> All the jokes are taken or adapted from niceonedad.com, justbadpuns.tumblr.com, into--the--abyss.tumblr.com and almost everyone who commented on this punny mess.  
> Enjoy!

CIEL (annoyed): Sebastian, I'm hungry!

SEBASTIAN (large stupid grin on his face): Hi hungry, I'm one hell of a butler!

CIEL: *facepalms*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN: Young master, why do bees hum?

CIEL: Because their wings flap very fast...?

SEBASTIAN: Because they don't know the words.

CIEL: Oh God...

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN: Young master, I started to read a book about the history of glue Grell lent to me...

CIEL: History of GLUE? That's the most ridiculous subject ever!

SEBASTIAN: Maybe, but I can't seem to put it down.

CIEL: *bored look*

 

* * *

 

CIEL: SEBASTIAN! PUT THE CAT OUT IN THIS INSTANT!

SEBASTIAN (rushing): Oh holy hell, I didn't know it was on fire!

CIEL: *takes deep breaths to calm himself*

 

* * *

 

CIEL: Sebastian! Can you put my shoes on?

SEBASTIAN: I'm sorry, young master, but I don't think they'll fit me.

CIEL: For Heaven's sake...

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (it's winter, they see a snowman): Young master, what do you get if you cross a snowman and a vampire?

CIEL: A very cold vampire?

SEBASTIAN: Nope. Frostbite.

CIEL:  _What did I do to be punished like this?_

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (after a dinner at the Midfords): I knew I shouldn't have had the seafood...

CIEL: But why? Are demons allergic to seafood?

SEBASTIAN: Generally speaking, no, but I'm feeling a little eel...

CIEL: You really,  _really_ had to make a joke, right?

 

* * *

 

CIEL (on the phone, giving orders): I'll call you later and inform you about the progress.

SEBASTIAN: Young master, please don't call me "later", call me Sebastian.

CIEL: *hangs up*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN: Young master, did you hear about that restaurant on the moon?

CIEL (sensing what's next): No...

SEBASTIAN: Such a shame: the food is great, but there's no atmosphere.

CIEL: *head meets desk*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (around Diedrich and Grell): I hate the jokes about the German sausages, they're the  _wurst_.

DIEDRICH: WHAT??

GRELL: *sneers*

CIEL: Sebastian, just bring that cake...


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> No one escapes from pun hell. No. One.

SEBASTIAN: Young master, do you know why did the scarecrow win an award?

CIEL: No.  _Here he goes again_...

SEBASTIAN: Because he was outstanding in his field.

CIEL: *sigh*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (towards Finny): Finnian, why can't your nose be 12 inches long?

FINNY (confused): I don't know, Mr. Sebastian...

SEBASTIAN: Because it would be a foot.

FINNY (still confused): Eh...?

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (to Bard): Last night I dreamt I was a muffler.

BARD: So what?

SEBASTIAN: I woke up exhausted.

BARD: *awkward silence*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (to Grell): What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches?

GRELL: A tired fish?

SEBASTIAN: A nervous wreck.

GRELL: Why do I even waste my time?

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (to Mey-Rin): How do you call a sketchy Italian neighbourhood, Mey-Rin?

MEY-RIN (shocked): I...I have no idea, Mr. Sebastian, yes I don't...

SEBASTIAN: The Spaghetto.

MEY-RIN: What?...

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN: This graveyard looks overcrowded.

CIEL: Sebastian?...

SEBASTIAN: People must be dying to get in there!

CIEL: Sebastian, this has been your worst pun yet.

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN: I'd like to give a shout-out to all the sidewalks!

CIEL: Why the sidewalks?

SEBASTIAN: Because they kept us off the streets, young master.

CIEL: *eye roll*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (to Tanaka): Would you like to hear a joke about paper, Mr. Tanaka?

TANAKA: Ho ho ho

SEBASTIAN (sigh): Nevermind, it's tearable.

TANAKA (inside his head): I'll kill you.

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (to Alois and Luka, about Hannah): Our wedding was so beautiful...

LUKA (small and innocent): But you and Hannah aren't married...

SEBASTIAN (not even listening):...even the cake was in tiers.

ALOIS (shakes his head): Come on, Luka, let's find Hannah.

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN: Young master, why do you think skeletons don't go trick-or-treating?

CIEL (screaming internally): I don't know, Sebastian, you tell me.

SEBASTIAN: Because they have no body to go with.

CIEL: I seriously think about swaping you for Grell one day.


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More victims...

SEBASTIAN (to Undertaker): Young master is on a tropical diet, and the manor is full of the stuff. It's enough to make a mango crazy.

UNDERTAKER: *dies of laughter*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (to Lau): Mr. Lau, why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom?

LAU (serious for the first time in his life): Because he's dead?

SEBASTIAN: Because the pee is silent.

LAU: *stares*

 

* * *

 

CIEL (at a spa in Baden-Baden): Is this pool safe for diving, Sebastian?

SEBASTIAN: It deep ends, young master.

CIEL: One day I'll punch you in the face and I won't be sorry.

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (to Alan and Eric): What do you call an Argentinian with a rubber toe?

ALAN: *shrugs*

SEBASTIAN: Roberto.

ERIC: *bites his tongue so he won't curse*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN: What does a panda hunter do, young master?

CIEL (emotionally tired): I don't know, Sebastian...

SEBASTIAN: Eats, shoots and leaves.

CIEL: Even Undertaker is funnier...

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (to Ronald): Why do crabs never give to charity, Mr. Knox?

RONALD: Is that something made to confuse me?

SEBASTIAN: Because they're shellfish.

RONALD: Senior Sutcliff and senior Spears really need to stab you.

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (to Elizabeth and Edward): What did the grape do when he got stepped on?

ELIZABETH: I don't know....

SEBASTIAN: He let out a little wine.

EDWARD: Mother was right, you really are indecent.

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (to Claude): What do you call a deer with no eyes?

CLAUDE: A blind deer?

SEBASTIAN: No idea.

CLAUDE: Then why did you ask me?

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN: Young master, I've just been diagnosed as colorblind.

CIEL (concerned for the first time): I'm really sorry, Sebastian..

SEBASTIAN: I know, it certainly has come out of the purple.

CIEL: *facepalm*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (to Claus): Mr. Claus, what do you call a fake noodle?

CLAUS: I don't know, Mr. Butler...

SEBASTIAN: An Impasta.

CLAUS:  _Mio Dio_ _..._

 


	4. Chapter 4

CIEL: Sebastian, I need help!

SEBASTIAN: Yes, young master?

CIEL: How do you spell "Mississippi"?

SEBASTIAN: The river or the state, young master?

CIEL: *screams internally*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (to William): Do you know why the coffee filed a police report?

WILLIAM: *pretends he heard nothing*

SEBASTIAN: It got mugged.

WILLIAM: *clenches fists*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN: Young master, what do you call a pony with a sore throat?

CIEL (biting the inside of his cheek): I have no idea....

SEBASTIAN: A little horse.

CIEL: I had to make a contract with this guy out of everyone...

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (to Wolfram): I used to hate facial hair...

WOLFRAM:...?

SEBASTIAN:...but then it grew on me.

WOLFRAM: *checks the dictionary*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN: Young master, did you hear about that cheese factory that exploded in France?

CIEL: WHAT??

SEBASTIAN: There was nothing left but de Brie...

CIEL: *facepalm*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (to Grell): Why couldn't the bicycle stand by itself?

GRELL (pissed off but trying to hide it): I don't know, Bassy, maybe you could tell me...

SEBASTIAN: It was two tired.

GRELL: I'm done *goes home*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (to Madame Red): How many apples grow on a tree, Madame?...

MADAME RED: *shrugs*

SEBASTIAN: All of them.

MADAME RED: If you think you're funny, then I'm sorry to disappoint you.

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (to Agni): What do you call cheese that isn't yours?

AGNI (sweet, precious and confused): I don't know, Mr. Butler...

SEBASTIAN: Nacho cheese.

AGNI: *rages internally because he didn't get it*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN: Young master, can February March?

CIEL: I don't know, Sebastian.

SEBASTIAN: No, but April May.

CIEL: *death glare*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN: Young master, I bought shoes from a drug dealer once...

CIEL: WHAT DID YOU DO, SEBASTIAN??

SEBASTIAN: I don't know what he laced them with, but I've been tripping the whole day.

CIEL: *facepalm*


	5. Chapter 5

SEBASTIAN: Young master, what did officer mollecule said to the suspect mollecule?

CIEL:...?

SEBASTIAN: I've got my ion you.

CIEL: *sighs into the sunset*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN: Young master, what do you call somebody with no body and no nose?

CIEL: A ghost who can't smell?

SEBASTIAN: Nobody knows.

CIEL: IF NOBODY KNOWS, SEBASTIAN, THEN WHY DID YOU ASK ME??

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (in mom mode to Grell): Don't trust atoms.

GRELL (shocked): Huh?!

SEBASTIAN: They make up everything.

GRELL: I'm gonna stab you.

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN: What did the buffallo say to his son when he left for college, young master?

CIEL: I have no idea...

SEBASTIAN: Bison.

CIEL: This dork, out of everyone...

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (in his disguise as a teacher, to Bluer): Mr. Bluer, do you know where do you learn to make ice-cream?

LAWRENCE BLUER (genuinely shocked): I...I don't know what you're talking about, Mr. Michaelis...

SEBASTIAN: At Sunday school.

LAWRENCE BLUER: Huh?...

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (in some alternate universe where the Nobel Prize exists): Young master, did you hear about the guy who invented the knock-knock joke?

CIEL: *silence*

SEBASTIAN: He won the "no-bell prize".

CIEL: *urge to punch Sebastian intensifies*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN: Young master, I just read a book about beavers.

CIEL: Good for you.

SEBASTIAN: It was the best dam book I've ever read.

CIEL: *takes deep breaths*

 

* * *

 

CIEL: Sebastian, did you get a haircut?

SEBASTIAN: No, young master, I got them all cut.

CIEL: *counts to 3 repeatedly*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (in some modern alternate universe): Two satellites decided to get married...

CIEL: This story sounds interesting actually.

SEBASTIAN: The wedding wasn't much, but the reception was incredible.

CIEL: Too soon...

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (again in a modern alternate universe): Young master, ever heard of the band 1023MB?

CIEL: Never.

SEBASTIAN: Of course, they haven't got a gig yet.

CIEL: *screams into the distance*


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ciel strikes back! Or at least he tries...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The first three jokes are from into--the--abyss.tumblr.com.

CIEL: Sebastian, I have a question.

SEBASTIAN: Yes, young master?

CIEL: Do you know how to make holy water?

SEBASTIAN: Well, I think a priest is needed...

CIEL: No, Sebastian. You boil the hell out of it.

SEBASTIAN: *confused staring*

 

* * *

 

CIEL: Sebastian?

SEBASTIAN: Yes, young master?

CIEL: Did it hurt...?

SEBASTIAN: What, young master?

CIEL: ...when you crushed the Earth's surface in your ascension from hell?

SEBASTIAN: What the heck, young master?

 

* * *

 

CIEL: Sebastian, bring me some cake, please!

SEBASTIAN: *brings one large slice of cake because Ciel finally learned to say  _please_ *

CIEL: Aren't I simply one hell of a master?

SEBASTIAN (turns around, raging): Young master, I think you went a bit far.

CIEL (feigns innocence):...?

SEBASTIAN: You know very well. That's my trademarked line I've been using since becoming your servant. AND THIS IS THE THANKS I GET?

CIEL: *awkward silence*

SEBASTIAN: I think I know how to "pun-ish" you.

CIEL (internally):  _Oh no..._

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN: Young master, what do you call a dog with no legs?

CIEL:...?

SEBASTIAN: It doesn't matter, young master. The dog won't come to you anyway.

CIEL: *desperate noises of someone hurt in their dog-lover feels*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (modern alternate universe): I wouldn't buy anything with Velcro...

CIEL: Who am I to judge your tastes?

SEBASTIAN:...it's a total rip-off.

CIEL: *boils*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (modern alternate universe again, to Abberline): Mr. Abberline, if prisoners could take their own mug shots...

ABBERLINE: *blank stare*

SEBASTIAN:...they'd be called "cellfies"

ABBERLINE: *facepalms into the night*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (modern alternate universe, to Grell): Why did the can-crusher quit his job?

GRELL: Because it's a stupid job?

SEBASTIAN: Because it was soda-pressing.

GRELL: I swear I'm going to step on your face one day.

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (modern alternate universe #64735637): Young master, what do prisoners use to call each other?

CIEL: Notes?

SEBASTIAN: Cell phones.

CIEL: *closes his eyes and tries some relaxing techniques learnt from Soma*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (at the Reaper Dispatch through some kind of ultra-extra-special permission, to William): I'm terrified of elevators...

WILLIAM (cold as ice): Not my business.

SEBASTIAN: I'm going to start taking steps to avoid them.

WILLIAM: How does that child manage with you without punching you?

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN: What do you call cheese by itself?

CIEL: *shrugs*

SEBASTIAN: Provolone.

CIEL: *screams internally into the infinity*


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Puns from justbadpuns.tumblr.com

SEBASTIAN: Young master, what do you call a man with no arms and no legs, hanging on the wall?

CIEL: The creepiest sight on Earth?

SEBASTIAN: Art.

CIEL: If that's art in your opinion, Sebastian, then you have a serious problem.

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (to Soma and Agni): Shout out to all the people who don't know the opposite of "in"!

SOMA AND AGNI: *awkward silence*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN: Young master, I went to a terrible piano concert last night.

CIEL (dead inside): I'm listening.

SEBASTIAN: The pianist made so many mistakes I can't even begin to Liszt. It was too much for me to Handel, so I left and demanded all my money Bach the next day.

CIEL: *massages his temples*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (to Rudgar and Sascha): How do you greet a German Pastry Chef?

RUDGAR: I don't understand...

SEBASTIAN: Gluten Tag

SASCHA: *laughs; threatening glint in their eyes*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (to Madame Red): I tried to finish the model of the human circulatory system for young master...

MADAME RED (concerned): Why didn't you ask me to help?

SEBASTIAN:...I didn't have the heart for it.

MADAME RED: *urge to stab Sebastian intensifies*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (modern alternate universe): I couldn't find my favorite TV show...

CIEL: *flips channels on TV*

SEBASTIAN: I guess it's Lost.

CIEL: *eye roll*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (to Claus): Mr. Claus, do you want to hear a pizza joke?

CLAUS (horrified): Mr. Butler, what are you talking about?

SEBASTIAN: Nevermind, it's too cheesy for you.

CLAUS:  _Santa Maria..._

CIEL: *facepalms into the sunset*

 

* * *

 

~~~~SEBASTIAN (to Hannah): I really "Poe" it doesn't get any worse, though I wouldn't recommend "Lenore"-ing it. _  
_

HANNAH (sarcasm level 9000): Thank you. I do appreciate when someone ruins my favorite writer.

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN: Dyslexic shoelaces of the world, untie!

CIEL: Not only bad, but also offensive. Good job, Sebastian.

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN: Young master, what do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a hole?

CIEL: Dead?

SEBASTIAN: Phil.

CIEL: *looks into the camera like in The Office*


	8. Chapter 8

SEBASTIAN: Young master, what do you call a banana doing a gymnastics move?

CIEL: ?

SEBASTIAN: Banana split.

CIEL: Now I'm hungry.

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN: Young master, why was the shoelace tired the next morning?

CIEL: I don't know if I want to hear that, Sebastian...

SEBASTIAN: Because he was up 'lace' last night.

CIEL: Is that a suggestion for something, Sebastian?

SEBASTIAN: Young master, it's very late. I suggest you go to sleep.

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (to Sieglinde, about English language): English doesn't "borrow" from other languages...

SIEGLINDE (confused): ?

SEBASTIAN: It follows them down a dark alley, robs them at knifepoint and rifles through their pockets, looking for loose words.

SIEGLINDE: Zis is not a very nice story, Mr. Butler.

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN: Young master, what do you call a man with no arms and no legs, laying on a beach?

CIEL: Not another sadistic joke...

SEBASTIAN: Sandy.

CIEL: *sprays Sebastian with holy water* Why didn't I use this earlier?

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (to Ash and Angela): How do you get two bigots to laugh on Sunday?

ASH AND ANGELA: ?

SEBASTIAN: Tell them a joke on Friday.

ASH AND ANGELA: *simultaneous raging*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (to Azzurro Vanel): What is the difference between a smart Italian and an unicorn?

AZZURRO VANEL: *mouth agape in shock*

SEBASTIAN: Nothing, they're both fictional characters.

CIEL (after being saved): Sebastian, next time you save me, don't. Ever. Make. Offensive. Jokes. Again.

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN: Never discuss infinity with a mathematician.

CIEL: Why not? They know more about it.

SEBASTIAN: They can go on about it forever.

CIEL: *head meets desk*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (to Grell): Waiting for death takes a lifetime.

GRELL: *looks into the camera like in The Office*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (to Ciel and Soma): Young masters, there's this pun about cows, but it's kind of offensive, so I won't say it.

SOMA: Thank you, Mr. Butler.

CIEL: Finally you learn to avoid offensive stuff.

SEBASTIAN: Yes, I don't want there to be any beef between us.

SOMA: ?

CIEL: *facepalms*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN: I made a pun about wind, but it blows.

CIEL: *cries internally*


	9. Chapter 9

SEBASTIAN: Young master, what do you call a man with no arms and no legs, laying on the floor?

CIEL: Something only Kelvin would keep in house?

SEBASTIAN: Matt.

CIEL: *screams internally into the sunset*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN: Young master, stairs are useful and all, but elevators are really some next level technology.

CIEL: *blank stare*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (modern alternate universe): When they turn the lights off on the Star Trek set, does it go Into Darkness?

CIEL: Now I won't be able to watch the movie without thinking about it.

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (to Ronald; modern alternate universe again): What do you call an intergalactical romance?

RONALD: Science-fiction?

SEBASTIAN: A space-ship.

RONALD: *facepalms*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (modern alternate universe. Again): I shouldn't have plugged my iPhone into the PC at the kitchen...

CIEL: Why? It got burned?

SEBASTIAN: No, it's now in the sync.

CIEL: *sprays him with holy water*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (to Grell): What do you do when you're cold?

GRELL (she's not even trying): Get an extra sweater?

SEBASTIAN: No, you go into the corner, it's about 90 degrees there.

GRELL: *punches him*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (AU where "Peter Pan" exists): Young master, I really enjoy "Peter Pan"...

CIEL: A normal interest for once!

SEBASTIAN:...it never gets old.

CIEL: What was I expecting?

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (to Alan and Eric, after they left the dispatch): Jokes about unemployed people aren't funny, they just don't work!

ALAN AND ERIC: *internal cursing*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN: Young master, do you want to hear a joke about constructions?

CIEL: No.

SEBASTIAN: Not a problem, young master. I'm still working on it.

CIEL: *head meets desk because he realizes Sebastian already told the joke*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (to Alois and Luka, about Hannah, again): I told Hannah she drew her eyebrows too high.

LUKA: But Hannah doesn't draw her eyebrows...

SEBASTIAN (not listening): She seemed surprised.

ALOIS (facepalming): How does Ciel support you?


	10. Chapter 10

SEBASTIAN (to Undertaker): Young master had piano practice today. He really struck a chord.

UNDERTAKER (nibbling a biscuit): Is that the best one you have?

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (modern alternate universe, to Charles Grey and Charles Phipps, right before a flight): A man sued an airline company after it lost his luggage.

CHARLES PHIPPS (indifferent): Shame.

SEBASTIAN: Sadly, he lost his case.

CHARLES PHIPPS: *drags Grey away before he kills Sebastian*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN: I used to hate maths, but then I realized decimals have a point.

CIEL (genuinely tired): No kidding, Sherlock.

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN: Young master, how does a penguin build its house.

CIEL: *shrugs*

SEBASTIAN: Igloos it together.

CIEL: *sprays him with holy water*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (to Grell, because she understands French jokes): Those who jump off a Paris bridge are in Seine.

GRELL: Couldn't you find anything more obvious?

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN: Young master, how do you call a man with no arms and no legs, floating in the water?

CIEL: A case for Abberline?

SEBASTIAN: Bob.

CIEL: *screams*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN (to Lizzy, Sieglinde and Soma, who read "Aladdin"): Travelling on a flying carpet is a rugged experience

LIZZY, SIEGLINDE, SOMA: *shocked faces*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN: A man walked in a chimney shop and asked "how much for this one?". The seller said: "it's on the house"

CIEL: *steps on his foot*

 

* * *

 

SEBASTIAN: After the iron was invented, there was a press conference.

CIEL: *facepalm*

 

* * *

 

CIEL: Sebastian!

SEBASTIAN: Yes young master?

CIEL (makes hand gesture to those who suffered the pun-ishment, who are behind him): I gathered everyone here today because you need to stop.

SEBASTIAN: Stop with what, young master?

GRELL (explodes): WITH YOUR ABSOLUTELY USELESS JOKES!

ALOIS: They are not even funny!

WILLIAM: They made me even sicker than before!

EVERYONE: STOP. WITH. THE. JOKES.

SEBASTIAN: But...but...

REAPERS: *take out the Death Scythes*

EVERYONE ELSE: *take out the holy water sprays*

CIEL: Did we make ourselves clear, Sebastian?

SEBASTIAN (sad kitten face): Yes, my lord.

CIEL: Good.

SEBASTIAN: Phew! Good thing they didn't find my cats...

CIEL: SEBASTIAN YOU SORRY EXCUSE FOR A DEMON!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That's it. That's the fic. Thank you for bearing with us in this mess. Hope you liked it ^_^


End file.
